6 Reasons the Unchurched Won’t Walk Through Our Doors

Almost all churches want to grow. 

Baptisms. 

Salvation decisions.  

Sunday School attendance.

Outreach.

 Growth is the core of who we are as Christians, right?

And yet consistently, year after year, we see baptisms decrease & church apathy increase. 

According to Lifeway Christian Resources, overall baptism numbers have declined eight of the past ten years. 

Almost my bluntness church, but THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!

Why is this happening?

What are we doing wrong? 

Why will literally thousands pile into a crowded sports arena, but churches feel they need to resort to begging and bribing just to get folks through our church doors? 

In my humble opinion, the problem isn’t a sinful, morally depraved society outside our doors.

  As uncomfortable as it may be, I believe the truth lies much closer to home. 

Here are 6 reasons why I feel the unchurched will never walk through our doors, UNLESS we make big changes.

1. They Can’t Find Us on the Internet.

In other words, many churches are technologically “ghosted” from the world.  IPADS, smart phones, blogs, vlogs, social media & livestreaming infiltrate every part of society except, it seems, the church. 

Going to the bank?  Make that deposit online! 

Need to go shopping?  Amazon to the rescue. 

Eating biscuits and gravy for supper?  Post the pic on social media! 

If we agree that such technologies aren’t in & of themselves sinful, then why wouldn’t we want to use any method available to reach others for Christ?

 Just this week I heard of a tiny (not surprisingly), rural church, that has become dissatisfied with their pastor because he has started a shocking practice.  

Wait for it… 

He starting using PowerPoint to highlight the points of his sermon.

From a computer.

 In the service. 

The horror!   (insert sarcasm)

Even worse, there are still churches that have no online or social media presence.  What?? 

Do we realize that the internet literally has the power to bring the soul saving, life-altering message of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ to people groups thousands of miles away with a simple click of the mouse? 

Why in the world would Christians shy away from this amazing gospel tool when it is right at our fingertips?

 Could the internet be used for evil?  Of course!  So could the telephone, the automobile or any other modern technological advance. 

But we didn’t shy away from calling folks to invite them to church in the 1960’s just because some might have used phones for bad things, did we? 

Wake up church! 

The internet is the first way prospective members will visit us.  It sends a clear message; either we have a vision for the future or we don’t.  Harsh but true. 

2. We Say “Come As You Are,” But Our Actions Don’t Show It. 

This may be one of my biggest pet peeves with the churches today.  We say we want the unchurched to come through our doors.  We invest thousands of dollars each year to bring them in. 

And yet, when they arrive, we become outraged when they act like…well…LOST PEOPLE. 

Yes, lost people sometimes use inappropriate language. 

Many times they don’t understand they shouldn’t leave the sanctuary during the sermon or text during prayer. 

They might not always respect church property, and if they are a child, they may run and scream in church. 

It’s our job to teach them God’s Word in love, but sometimes, we expect lost people to come through our doors & already understand our “unstated” traditions and  “rules.”   

So how can we be more loving? 

• Be patient when the church bus comes back from a youth trip dirty, or when teenagers sneak off to smoke a cigarette during Bible Study.  

• Offer to help the mother whose baby is crying. 

• Don’t get frustrated when a visitor sits in your pew.

• Teach! 

• Guide! 

• Love!

Most important, when a visitor comes to your church who is a little rough around the edges, pray for their salvation (if they aren’t saved already) & when they do come to know Jesus, THEN begin discipleship.

3. We’ve Lost Our Credibility.  Whether we like it or not, our society has become tolerant of almost any lifestyle and personal choice.

  Sadly, those who speak against this “anything goes” mentality are often labeled as bigots.  For Christians, this is a tricky area but one we must not avoid.   

The Bible clearly outlines expectations for holy living. 

Sin is dangerous, period. 

But, if a lost world only hears the church screaming judgment with no connection made to our desperate need for a redemptive Savior, the message often falls on deaf ears.  This, unfortunately makes us easy to dismiss & causes us to lose all credibility. 

We must find a way to make our message clear without alienating those who need our message of hope. 

They need to hear this simple truth…

God loves us. 

We choose to sin. 

Sin separates us from God.

Christ is our only hope for reconciliation. 

Often this message of love is overshadowed by hate disguised as the gospel. 

Specifically, I think of churches who advocate for the killing of abortion doctors, protest solders’ funerals, or expect a series of rules be followed to remain in good standing with God. 

 Such legalistic approaches weaken the credibility of the church at its core and are not Christlike. 

Don’t misunderstand! 

Do we need to preach the truth from God’s Word?  YES! 

Does this include shining a light on social injustices & calling out sin when we see it?  Absolutely! 

But, we must also put aside legalism when interacting with a lost world and share truth with Christlike concern & humility. 

4. Our Music is Often Archaic & Unrelateable.

 Yes, I said it.  This may be the most controversial point I make in this post, but I must be honest. 

Whether we like it or not, for many people (myself included) music is an integral part of worship.

I love my pastors and have been blessed to learn and grow under some of the best, but I often worship more before the sermon than during.

     I am a musical person. 

    I am a feeler! 

Yes, I cognitively understand God’s love, & enjoy digging deeper into the finer details of Scripture, but the times I feel the closest to Jesus are when my hands are raised to Him in song! 

It’s just who I am, and I think there are others like me.

The music in our churches MUST be culturally relevant.

Am I saying we need three drummers and a bass guitar for every service? 

Of course not.

But I am saying that IF we expect a lost world to feel welcomed & relaxed in our churches, we should employ high quality music that appeals to a variety of ages and worship styles. 

Hymns?  Yes! 

Praise songs.  Yes!

Our music should match the society in which we serve! 

If I attended a worship service in Central America, I certainly wouldn’t expect to hear high chorale pieces with a pipe organ. 

 I also wouldn’t play Southern Gospel music in Russia. 

The key is making the message of Jesus culturally relevant without being sinful.

In mainstream music, lyrics are sometimes impure & dance movements inappropriate. 

But it isn’t the instruments, tempo, or beat that are sinful, right?  It’s the actions of those performing.

In a church setting, of course these types of sinful displays shouldn’t be tolerated.

 But if a song is rich in Scripture, causes others to worship and doesn’t have questionable actions resulting from it, we should at least open our eyes to the possibility that our own personal biases may be preventing others from experiencing true worship.

5. The Lost Are Too Busy on Sundays.

 The Sabbath day is to be set apart, holy.  I could write an entire post about this topic! 

But facts are facts. 

The lost (and sadly some of the saved) put everything else in front of Sunday morning & evening worship. 

For many churches, if you miss Sundays, then you are out of luck the rest of the week to participate in any small group discipling. 

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if there were opportunities for small groups with similar interests to study together on Monday nights, Thursday mornings, or even Saturdays at lunch? 

Could this unconventional approach reach new folks who aren’t attending now?

Should we do away with Sunday services?  No! 

But, I do think that the lost often view our churches as a “one day only” gig with few opportunities to accommodate for their lifestyles. 

Shouldn’t everyone keep the Sabbath day holy?  Of course! 

But remember that the unchurched will not act like the churched.  They must be taught. 

Why not meet them where they are and love them in the process?

After all, shouldn’t worship & discipleship happen throughout the week?  

As those in church leadership know, most salvation decisions do not occur in corporate worship services.  They happen in Sunday School, small groups, Vacation Bible School, and in one on one conversations.

 What do these things have in common? 

They are small group settings where folks feel comfortable learning and communicating. 

Imagine how incredibly effective our churches could be if Sunday School occurred in restaurants, homes, or even online in addition to the traditional building setting?

6. We’ve Watered Down the Gospel Message.

I believe that the number one problem of the church today is that we have watered down the gospel to the point that faith seems optional.

We treat church like a social event, offering countless incentives and gimmicks to get folks through the door.

 I’ve seen and done them all. 

Giveaways. 

Food. 

Carnival games. 

Entertainment. 

But the problem is that once new folks arrive, we gloss over the truth out of fear!

 It isn’t popular, but the truth is the truth. 

God is our Savior and He is our friend.

He is loving and He is kind. 

BUT, He is also the Ruler of the Universe, our Lord and our Judge! 

We NEED Him more than the air we breathe.

 A relationship with Him isn’t an after thought or something we can decide on when life slows down. 

It’s urgent and real and time sensitive! 

 It truly is the most important decision we will ever make.

And yet we, as the church, often silently submit to a message of mediocrity because it is socially uncomfortable to mention words like sin, hell, and death.

So church, what is the solution?

 Let’s bring in the masses to our events!

Let’s feed them, entertain them & provide for their physical needs!

 Let’s love them & let’s wrap our arms around them!

 BUT PLEASE (and do not miss this point)…before they leave our care,  share the truth of their spiritual condition.

Let them know that if they die apart from Jesus, their destiny is set! 

Assure them that neither Jesus nor us want this to happen but that THEY must choose to follow Him.

If we blend unconditional acceptance with their intense need for a Savior,  the lost will not only WANT to come to our churches, but they just might be compelled to share this message of hope with others in a similar state.  Isn’t this what true evangelism truly is?

The American church is at a crossroads. 

The choice is ours.  

Will we hold fast to tradition in spite of relevancy or will we become “like the Jew to win the Jews” just as 1 Corinthians 9:20 urges us? 

To me, the answer lies in the actions of Christ Himself. ..

The One who tailored His message for the audience in front of Him. 

When talking to fisherman He spoke of fish.  To church leaders?  He connected Jewish law to the new covenant. 

He was willing to meet a lost world who so desperately needed Him right where they were. 

Why, oh church, won’t we?

Amy Riley has served in church ministry for twenty three years as a worship leader and children’s and youth minister. She is also a certified school counselor, a writer and a lover of all things that sparkle. Amy lives with her husband and daughter in the rolling hills of Central Kentucky.